Richard Gere is kinda not the good guy in this – he keeps killing his bosses. His “sister” was in Invasion of the Body Snatchers the same year, making her the cinema queen of 1978. I recently saw farm owner Sam Shepard leading The Right Stuff and haunting Hamlet, but he’s one of those guys I can’t seem to recognize. Linda Manz is given incredible lines and makes a great narrator; I need to catch up with her in Out of the Blue. Happy to finally get around to watching this beautiful blu-ray, hope I get to see it in an actual theater someday. Good reactions: Brendanowicz, and PD187 (katy said the same thing). Guess I’ve written up all the Malick movies… Badlands doesn’t have an entry, but was covered here (and is due a rewatch, as are ALL of them, including this one).

Animals of Heaven:

Thirsty traveler (star of Tampopo) enters dusty village, finds a stream and nearby house, meets Yuri (a female impersonator, also of Yumeji) and coincidentally his long-missing friend Akira (of Samurai Rebellion), who has become Yuri’s reclusive boyfriend and the town bell-ringer who keeps away evil spirits. The traveler would like to see the local Demon Pond before returning to work in the morning and his friend offers to guide him. Seems like a restrained, traditional Japanese folk story so far, but I was underestimating it.

As soon as the girl is alone, a carp poacher spies on her until he’s bitten by a crab, then the movie turns suddenly goofy, the carp and crab transforming into costumed characters off to see the undersea princess (same actre(ss) as Yuri), the eerie score mutated into crazy electro music. The princess wants to see her lover at another lake but is trapped here as long as the bell is faithfully rung. Back in town the poacher gets an angry mob after Yuri, insisting the bell not be rung, realizing their mistake too late as the lake destroys the town. I enjoyed this more than Shinoda’s Silence. Carp also starred in Pitfall, and Crab was in The Eel (heh).

Two siblings and three of their buddies take a lil roadtrip to see if their slaughterhouse grandpa got dug up in the reported wave of grave robbings. This is something I’d completely forgotten: they’re not lost tourists, the Leatherface family is their own family’s next door neighbors. Of course they’re still new-age hippies who’ve lost touch with their roots, but they’re not such sheltered city folks that they won’t stop and pick up a freaked-out and bloody hitchhiker.

Leatherface sits down and takes a breather:

Kirk (sledgehammered) later did set decoration for The Craigslist Killer, Pam (slaughter-hooked) became a catalog foot model, and Jerry (also sledged) left the movie business. Wheelchair-bound Franklin, who sits nice and still while being surprise-chainsawed, was in the next year’s Race With the Devil. With a half-hour left, his sister Sally is the last one alive, getting subdued by a gas station guy with a broom and brought home for dinner before her famous escape. Sally was in Tobe’s Eaten Alive, the hitchhiker became a voice actor for Power Rangers, only the gas station guy returned for the sequel, but all of them – especially Leatherface Gunnar – were haunted for decades by the fangoria fanbase.

Wouldn’t you know it, two people associated with different hilarious mid-seventies Frankenstein films died on consecutive days, so we’ve got a double-feature on our hands. It’s Gene and Marty’s movie, but Teri Garr runs away with it. Leachman isn’t around too much, and Madeline Kahn features (hilariously) only in the first few minutes and the last twenty-or-so, becoming happily Franken-brided, which frees Dr. Gene to be with Teri. I was distracted when Gene arrives at the train station and a kid points him to track 29. Is the joke that there’d be so many tracks in Transylvania? Was Dennis Potter watching this on cable while writing the script for the Nic Roeg movie?

Paul Morrissey died at the tail end of SHOCKtober so I immediately put on his masterpiece. Mad Scientist Udo Kier is building a race of zombie superpersons with his equally mad assistant Otto, while the doctor’s wife is having a barely-secret affair with houseboy Joe Dallesandro, who is disturbed to see his late buddy’s head atop Udo’s monster.

Beautiful movie, full of Cronenbergian wound-fetishes and guts comin’ at ya (it’d be so sweet to see the 3D version). I can’t remember the Frank family’s two children having any lines but they’re lurking behind walls and windows in every scene. All the people and monsters tear each other apart through malice and/or incompetence, and after Udo’s incredible disembowelment, Joe is still alive but a captive of the psychotic tots (she’s the girl we saw die in Who Saw Her Die, soon to star in Demons).

Alice is a creepy kid who loves masks and torments her popular little sister Brooke Shields. After Brooke is murdered in church and her mom’s shitty sister is repeatedly stabbed in her legs and hands, Alice is brought in for questioning. The parents take her home against psych recommendations, and more people get stabbed, but the masked raincoat killer has been the family’s psycho-catholic housekeeper (a Spike Lee regular)… all along? It’s confusing since Alice wears the same getup, but given the movie’s half-giallo half-Don’t Look Now influence, it’s probably meant to be confusing.

Unlike Tucker & Dale we got real filmmakers in charge, though you wouldn’t know it from checking their other credits – Sole made porn and did production design for the Wishmaster and Donnie Darko sequels, the producers and DPs made nothing, and the editor cut The Garbage Pail Kids Movie. But for a brief moment in the mid-70s they made a beautiful slasher film in which the vibes are so far off.

This is the real stuff, pre-Lynchian eccentricity (even art directed by Jack Fisk) with rich color, good eerie music and some quirky sound editing.

Marianna Hill (Blood Beach, Schizoid) is seeking her missing dad, finds a hotel room throuple (Joy Bang of Night of the Cobra Woman; Anitra Ford of Invasion of the Bee Girls; Tiresome Tom) in the middle of interviewing freaked-out Elisha Cook, who says she’d better kill and burn her dad if she finds him. Anitra ditches the group now that Tom is slobbering over the new girl, she flees a rat-eating albino then comes across a gang of locals eating raw meat at Ralph’s, so they grab and eat her instead.

Marianna finds dad’s house and his diary entries about gradually turning into a zombie. She’s not doing so well herself, vomiting up bugs and lizards. Tom hasn’t adequately explained himself, claims to be just an art dealer, but knows that the bleeding eyes indicate a transformation is starting. Sometimes zombification takes long enough to leave behind an entire diary, sometimes it happens real fast (a cop changes sides mid-shootout). Dad Royal Dano (Gramps in House II, the farmer in Killer Klowns) finally comes home to provide an 1870s backstory flashback about a dark priest hiding in the sea. But it stays compellingly mysterious because none of these things exactly come together – even the DVD commentary guys agree that it’s never clear exactly what’s the deal in this town. The directors getting kicked off the movie before the editing couldn’t have helped.

Royal Le Fou, he blue himself:

All sorts of weirdos show up in this. The first victim is Walter Hill, a rude art gallery guy is Morgan Fisher, a murdered mechanic was the killer Santa from Silent Night Deadly Night. Huyck directed Howard the Duck, which I’m not keen to revisit even though I enjoyed it when I was ten, and with Gloria Katz he wrote Radioland Murders and Temple of Doom. Elisha was prolific – it’s exciting to think I’ve got 100 more Elisha performances to go.

Good tagline: “Their crime was against nature – nature found them guilty.” This refers to the lead asshole, on a camping trip with his unwilling wife, who trashes and destroys and kills every natural thing he comes across. He flicks wildfire cigs out the window and runs down a roo before they even arrive, then shoots a manatee he thought was a shark, is always brandishing axes and missile weapons.

Can these matching jackets save their marriage?

The wife didn’t want to be here in the first place, won’t let him touch her because she has a headache this year. He persists, both with her and with his camping-by-brute-force mission. An eagle attacks him, weirdly, then a possum bites him, righteously. A half hour before the movie’s over we’re still in anything-could-happen mode. After the wildlife frustrations and the wife threatening to exit the campsite and the marriage, husband kills her with a speargun, then he tries to fuck his way out of the swampy forest in a 2WD Nissan. At this point we know he’ll die – and he does in the funniest way, getting run down by a truck when a cockatoo attacks its driver.

When not spending time with the horrible humans the movie offers a parade of cool creatures. This was the back half of my Australian weirdo-horror double-feature. From the writer and cinematographer of Roadgames, Eggleston later made a (bad?) vampire movie featuring the expectant husband from Body Melt.

Looks and sounds like shit right from the start, with spectacularly out-of-sync sound recording. Manos: The Last House on the Left Hands of Fate, about a misanthrope making snuff films, made by a (presumed) misanthrope and looking like an actual snuff film. “This isn’t my cup of tea. I’m not interested in art.”

Dirtbag Bill, about to drill-kill:

Terry, who looks like Dirtbag Bill Hader, gets out of jail for drug dealing and says he’ll show ’em all. Filmmaker Bill isn’t getting much play from his softcore lesbian dramas and blackface whipping scenes. They kidnap some people and murder them on camera, then a voiceover tells us they were all apprehended, ok. An incoherent, possibly evil movie. The cinematographer later shot Avengers: Infinity War, which makes sense.

Despite this movie’s rocky/aborted release it definitely predates the Misfits song: